Sunday, May 12, 2013

In The Grip of Grace

I've always imagined grace as ephemeral, drifting light as a feather, settling peacefully on someone's shoulder. Or around him, unnoticed. Or seen, but not recognized. Maybe even shrugged off.

But I think "in the grip of grace" has a ring of truth to it. It's an assertion of existence, a shameless declaration of being. Because there is grace, wherever you look.

There is grace in loneliness. When you are with no one but your thoughts, in the silence you recognize your own voice and discover that being by yourself isn't so bad after all, and that you are not truly, not ever, alone.

There is grace in broken relationships. When you try and put a number on how much you've given of yourself, how many times you've cried in anger and frustration and hurt, you get to the point where you count how many times you've almost given up but didn't and you realize how strong you really are.

There is grace in unfulfilled dreams. When you grieve over those wasted years that you feel amounted to nothing and you call to mind the faces of the people you love whom you've disappointed, you realize that they believe in you because they see something there, and they love you anyway even if there wasn't.

There is grace in pain. When you feel that nothing, nothing, nothing could feel worse, you wonder how you could possibly still be alive, why you can still stand up and, despite not knowing where to go from where you fell, you find that you can still walk on, move forward, if you just put one foot in front of the other.

She stands in your path and looks you square in the eye. She grabs you by the shoulders and whispers, Here I am. Look at me. I am grace.

(photo by Julie De Leon)


Anonymous said...

Although I am inferior to these beautiful words- an unspoken girl whom young, but old enough to actually understand the writing, itself, I still try. And my attempts would be just as graceful. I believed, that grace wasnt as ephemeral as you'd described it at first, moreover I thought of grace as a thing of talent, like a women or a man could have grace, they could obtain it-and it would show. Like, the way they moved, danced, talked, or even ate would be laced with the subtle yet bold grace. But of course, I find your point of view much more interesting than mine, grace could be found in the heartbroken, in the lonely, and so much more. But I feel as though its not so much as grace, as it is the "benefits" or the "beauty" of them as well, either way you're writing was wonderful and so inspirational.

arturo said...